Screw The Boardwalk Was A Success!

I was completely unable to attend the first Screw The Boardwalk event, but I just heard from John the organizer and it sounds like it was a complete success! John tells me: (We) had about 50 people and got nothing, but love from just about everyone that happened upon us: People yelling ‘thank you’ from apartment balconies, bikers and walkers doing the same. 

Based on the photos and feedback on the group’s facebook page, it looks like it was not only productive, but a load of fun! A big thanks to everybody who showed up!  Hopefully there will be more Screw the Boardwalk events in the future 🙂

Head over to the Screw The Boardwalk facebook group and check out the photos! The City of Long Beach official Facebook group has more photos as well. GOOD STUFF!

Screw The Boardwalk Event! [It’s Hammer Time*]

Banging instead of screwing. That is what’s in store for next Sunday’s Screw The Boardwalk event.  John over @ Screw the Boardwalk sent me over the details:

When:  Sunday, October 21st at 10am
Where:  Boardwalk at Magnolia
Who:  Anyone and everyone that wants to help fix the boardwalk
What:  We’ll be working with the boardwalk maintenance crew to identify and replace old, rotting or warped boards. The folks from the city will train volunteers to spot boards that need to be replaced and how to replace them. We’re considering this event a ‘pilot’ program that, if successful, will lead to a significantly larger event in the Spring.

Bring hammers if you’ve got them. If not, the city is going to try and provide as many as possible. T-Shirts will be handed out for all volunteers (while supplies last).

Don’t forget to visit the Screw the Boardwalk facebook page for the lastest info on this event.

*Hammer Time joke was made by John already on facebook… Hey, I like to give credit where credit’s due 🙂

City Manager: “I have reiterated the no vehicles directive.” [The Boardwalk Is Not A Road]

(Photo taken yesterday by an anonymous reader and uploaded to us via the anonymity photo dump. Is this an emergency? Where are the segways or Police Golf Carts?)

Ok, so the city is listening to our complaints regarding all the vehicular (truckparking enforcement vehicle) traffic on the boardwalk. I just heard from City Manager Jack Schnirman and he had this to say: “I agree completely, and have been working hard to change the culture where vehicles, particularly in the off summer season, were on boardwalk. Nevertheless, I have reiterated the no vehicles directive.” This is all similar to what John from Screwtheboardwalk reported a few weeks back  (read – Screwin’ Ain’t Easy – An update and solicition for opinions on Screw the Boardwalk.)

What about that parking enforcement vehicle that I spotted the other day? Jack said he had the police commissioner pull the records from Sunday night to see about the parking enforcement issue. He believes it was one of the specials using a vehicle to respond to a call.

I’ve met Jack several times and I believe him when he says he’s working on it; the guy really wants to save this city some money. Less boardwalk repair is one way we can save cash, but we have to keep pushing this topic. It’s going to take a culture change as well. Some long time city workers just love taking the scenic route… Please keep sending me your photos. I have five total so far, but we need more! If you want to remain anonymous, upload them with our public anonymity photo dump or just email me directly. I won’t share your email or name (and I think I’m a nice guy to chat with.)

 Related Articles:


What is a Parking Enforcement SUV doing on the boardwalk? [Let us end truck traffic on the boardwalk right now)

UPDATE Sept 10th:

I realize there are many of you who wish to remain anonymous. For that, I created the Seabythecity Anonymity Photo Dump: Click this link and send your photos to me. You can also always email me. Your email address and name will never be published without your consent.


Tonight (Sunday) at around 7pm there was a navy blue City of Long Beach Parking Enforcement truck cruising the boardwalk between Neptune & Franklin Blvds. Now, I don’t recall illegal parking to ever be an issue on our boardwalk, do you?

The driver appeared to be cruising on what was a perfect Sunday night where tons of people were walking, biking and soaking in the salt air. I’ve already had it up to HERE with beach maintence and their trucks this week. Maybe it’s time for a change. Who is in charge of these actions and when is the city going to wake up and put an end to this madness? The old ways of doing business in this city needs to stop.

The reason why our boardwalk is in such bad condition is because of these trucks loosening the boards. As a taxpayer who pays for these jobs and wood, I want truck traffic on the boardwalk to end now. Perhaps this should be a major issue during our next city council election?

I wasn’t able to snap a photo of the parking enforcement truck tonight, but can my readers do me a favor? Every time you see a truck, I don’t care if it’s a police, parking enforcement, beach maintenance or whatever, please snap a photo and send them in so I can post them on here. Try to get faces too if you can. TAKE PHOTOS OF ALL TRUCKS ON THE BOARDWALK AND MAIL THEM TO ME (contact page).

Coney Island uses golf/Gem cars (see photo below). Why can’t we too? I’d rather the city spend our money on those instead of wood and slip and fall lawsuits.

I cringe every time I see a truck on the boardwalk

Photo taken this morning at around 8am. I mean, I just feel bad for the boards; they’re not made for so much weight! When is this city going to finally grow up and stop hurting those boards? Does beach maintenance do this just to justify their jobs? Because that would be really silly and wasteful. There are a thousand other things they could do instead. Want a list?

And what happened to the Segways? Are they back in storage? I guess those are just for the police department, but I haven’t seen one in a while.

Screwin’ Ain’t Easy – An update and solicition for opinions on Screw the Boardwalk

First off, I want to thank Anthony and the rest of the folks here at Sea by the City for loaning us this platform to give you all an update.  For those who know, the concept behind Screw the Boardwalk originated on the pages of this blog, so it’s only fitting that it continues on here in some way shape or form.

Anywho, below is what constitutes my very much overdue – and rather wordy – update on where things stand with the Screw the Boardwalk initiative.  My apologies for it taking so long, but there were a number of factors I needed to get ironed out before going back to you, the people, to solicit your thoughts.

Here we go:

First and foremost, the City is 100% behind this and wants to figure out a way to engage residents in restoring the boardwalk to its former glory (not that I know when that was, but I’m sure the boardwalk was glorious at some point in time).  That said there are definitely some issues to figure out and hurdles to overcome, many of which I’ll outline for you here.  When you’re done reading, I would love get your thoughts on how to proceed.  This is, after all, a ‘grassroots’ effort.  I might be driving the car, but I’m counting on all of you for directions.  Please, please, pleeeeease share your thoughts either in the comments section below, or over on the Screw the Boardwalk Facebook page.

  1. There are insurance issues.  Yes, everyone doing work will need to sign some sort of waiver absolving the city of any liability should you get hurt.  Even with that being the case though, the City is concerned about the inherent dangerous nature of this work.  You know, people doing work 12-14 feet up with no safely nets and the such.   We can figure out ways to work around this.
  2. There are ‘quality of work’ issues.  The City is going to be held liable for any and all work done on the boardwalk.  The onus is on them to make sure all work meets City approval and standards.  This means we’ll have to be well supervised.  Like issue #1, we can clear this hurdle, I think.
  3. Here’s the big one.  We all want better wood and we want to screw the sh*t out of the boardwalk, right?  Well, there’s this little group called the Army Corp of Engineers that’s out there, and they’ve got a plan that, if approved, would involve ripping up the whole boardwalk, replacing it, building up higher sand dunes and a whole slew of other measures that would serve to protect our fair city from the next big hurricane, tsunami or zombie apocalypse.

Long Beach has been down this road before.  The plan was basically rejected by the City some years back and has been stalled out since.  We’re not here to debate the merits of said plan.  I know it’s controversial.  What I am here to say, however, is that the city isn’t looking to invest big money in buying better boards and start screwing the boardwalk until they know if it’s going to be torn down by the Army Corp, and that decision won’t be made for another year or two.

Personally, I can’t blame them.  Why spend a ton of money on something that might get ripped up in pretty short order?  I wouldn’t waste my money on that and I guess the City doesn’t want to waste theirs (I mean, ours) on it either.

So here’s where we stand.

The City has offered to give us a trial run in September once all those pesky out of towners finally leave us alone.  They’ll break us up into smaller crews and we’ll get to have at it.  Only problem is, we’ll be NAILING the boardwalk, not SCREWING it.  And we’ll be using the same wood they’re currently using to replace boards.  Again, why should the City waste money if the whole thing has the potential to be ripped up?

That said (and I know you can all attest to this) damn near all the boards on the boardwalk need to be replaced, so we could make some serious progress in improving the condition of the boardwalk in the near-term while others choose to debate the relative merits of the Army Corp’s plan and whether we’ll see whole sale changes made in the future.  If we move forward with the City’s offer, they’ll essentially be using it as a trial run for a much larger event once a final decision gets made on the plan.

So what do you say people?  Disappointed you won’t get to screw?  I am, but I’m also happy to nail since I know it will help make some progress until a final decision is made.

Do we move forward and embrace a new mantra of Nail the Boardwalk, or do we say, “Screw it”.  I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Much thanks,

John and the committee to Screw (and/or Nail) the Boardwalk


‘Screw The Boardwalk’ Needs Your Help, So Get On Board (no pun intended)

Back in October 2011, I made up a fake political party called the Transparency Party. My first order of business was to screw the boardwalk. Read (October 24th, 2011)- OPINION: The boardwalk is like an old car (and why I want to screw the boardwalk). With that in mind, I am happy to see a grassroots movement with the same intention start up independently by one of our readers (See: Screw The Boardwalk on Facebook).

Let’s face it, we all want to screw the boardwalk. The boardwalk screws us with broken boards, flat tires, high maintenance costs, raised nails and splinters. Why can’t we have a turn?

The good folks over at Screw the Boardwalk have done an impressive job building up support for the cause. 119 people in a week isn’t too shabby, but it’s not enough.If this is really going to happen though, they need our support. They made good on their promise and have reached out to the city asking that they make the event happen. For the city to agree to do this, they’re going to need to see an overwhelming amount of support.

Are you ready to step up for your community? Head on over to the facebook page and hit ‘like’. They’ll keep you posted about the progress being made and how you can get involved.  This is the definition of grassroots, people. Get on board (no pun intended), won’t you?

Read all related SBTC stories on Screwing The Boardwalk.


A little conversation about a grass roots movement regarding boardwalk repair promoted Long Beach resident John into creating a facebook group called Screw The Boardwalk. Originally the group’s goal was for us to take matter into our own hands with drills and screws, but then thought of liability and a pissed off union changed a few minds (including mine). Now its goal is to bring awareness to the city that we residents want to help.

John’s group manifesto is the following:

We started this page as a means of showing the city that we want to help. We get it, the city is cash strapped. But we also get that this isn’t a ‘big ticket item’ and that, with a little elbow grease and some civic pride, the citizens of Long Beach could help the city restore the boardwalk in pretty short order and at extremely low cost.

If you’re down with the idea, LIKE this page and SHARE it with your friends. Once we get a decent mass of people, we’ll work with the city to make it happen. You have our word, if enough people step up, we shall not drop the ball on this.

So get on it. Spread the word. Screw the boardwalk! 

Check out the group @ Facebook:  Screw the Boardwalk and maybe we can make a difference!


Concerning the Boardwalk (PART II): Splinters, Nails and Raised Boards

In yesterday’s post concerning the boardwalk & thugs, many of you suggested that the real thug was the boardwalk itself. It comes in the form of splinters, loose nails & raised boards. So what’s going on? How long are we going to have to live with this state of the boardwalk? And is it really that bad?

The new gang fancied themselves as the Boardwalk Party during the last election with the sole purpose of fixing the boardwalk. Here we are 7+ months later and the boardwalk is still a mess. Yes, the repairs HAVE been quicker, so I give them credit for that, but there is no chance in hell we’re going to see an entirely new boardwalk anytime soon. That is, unless the city gets some sort of grant or wins the lottery. Does Long Beach have a rich relative who is on their death bed? Perhaps all what Long Beach needs is a sugar daddy? The point is, our city just has no cash to replace the entire boardwalk. I still don’t understand why they can’t just use a harder wood and screws. Can somebody please explain that to me? Whatever…

There is a positive spin to all this, as Allison in the comments of yesterday’s post puts it:

[quote]The way it is now it’s like speed bumps and I’m ok with that. It’s kind of like my street that’s all gnarled up but somewhat slows down people. The boardwalk should be a slow experience, not high-speed and I do believe that could potentially happen with a new one.[/quote]

I have to admit… I kind of agree. Maybe these imperfections are actually keeping it safer. Half the people who are walking on the boardwalk don’t even realize there is a bike lane there to begin with. Can you imagine how dangerous it would be if cyclists road even faster? And about  those raised nails; flat tires keep our local bike shops in business. Those raised nails are good for our local economy!

HA! So yeah, let’s just use a harder wood with screws and call it a day.

OPINION: The boardwalk is like an old car (and why I want to screw the boardwalk).

We already mentioned this LB Patch article last week regarding ‘fixing the boardwalk (read @ LB PATCH – Letter to Editor: Coalition Fixing Democrats’ Infrastructure Mess). The author of that article was rightfully expressing his opinion, so here I am expressing one of my own. There are tons of comments and I personally haven’t had the time to skim through them. I’m not sure if the analogy you’re about to read was already used (sorry in advance if it was). This is how I interprete that opinion article: (Please note: Before a Sally starts harassing me, the Sally in this story is a fictional character).

Sally has this really old car that constantly needs fixing. The older the car gets, the more money Sally puts in to fix it. Sally spent a lot more money fixing this aging car than the previous owner, so she is better than them.  

Does that make any sense? Am I missing something here? Read the article yourself and please correct me if I’m wrong. I mean, there comes a point when the car can’t be fixed anymore. Sally has to stop spending money on it and get a new one!

Back in June of 2009 the City of Long Beach approved a Capital Improvement plan and mentions rebuilding the boardwalk. (LB Herald June 2009 – City approves capital improvement plan). As I have constantly stated since 2008, this blog is not a news organization (hence, all of our opinions), so I could be missing some pieces to this puzzle. It appears to me that there hasn’t been any movement with replacing the boardwalk since that June 2009 article. Please let me know if I am missing any followups and I will correct this part of this post.

I never built a boardwalk, but I am guessing it takes a lot of coordinating between many people: The Army Corps of Engineers, Coastal engineers, probably the DEC, The City of Long Beach, maybe Nassau County or New York State and a whole lot of other people that I don’t even know about. Oh yeah, and it probably costs a lot of money with the possibility of a storm wall, new foundation and a new type of board (wood or synthetic). But enough with these quick fixes and let’s come up with a plan and make sure it gets built the right way.

If you elect me under the Transparency Party ticket, I wouldn’t do any more quick repairs. This is how I would fix it:

MESSAGE TO THE BOARDWALK: SCREW YOU!!! No more nails and 2X4s, I would use screws and a harder wood. Screws stay in better and won’t come out with all the vibration. No cars over 3000lb would be allowed on the boardwalk and the LBPD will be issued Gem cars for patrolling.

Below are images of the boardwalk over in Fire Island – harder wood and screws. Yep, somebody screwed the Fire Island boardwalk.